Prem described his deep guilt at having caused Fran so much pain, also his remorse at behaviour that he recognised as selfish. Pleasure had been replaced by pain. He was trying to answer all Fran's questions but was getting irritated whenever she brought up the topic, particularly after a few days of "normality". He resented her checking up on him as this left him feeling scrutinised and mistrusted. Whilst he agreed that Fran might still be suspicious, he said he was a person with integrity who had recommitted to Fran, and there was no reason for her to now not trust him. He felt frustrated and impatient to move on.

Karen explained that a long-term feeling of trust can only be rebuilt over time and that women want their men to be caring, loyal and understanding. If he showed irritability or impatience, Fran's growing trust may be broken again. Trust would eventually be restored by how he behaved towards her

Prem acknowledged that the price he had to pay for his behaviour was to continue to be patient. Nevertheless, he wanted Fran to know that her reactions caused him to feel doomed to eternal punishment. When he discussed this with her in a caring way Fran could see his point of view.

Research shows that women have a better memory for events of an emotionally charged nature than men, and may need more time to recover from the trauma of a partner's affair. If her man can remain patient and deal with his own feelings - of being checked up on, restricted, and frustrated - by calmly explaining his perspective, the woman in time will settle as trust is restored.